A Tomorrow Worth Waking Up For...

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There are times in our experiences when we allow ourselves to get so caught up in the ebb and flow of life that we forget the sounds of our own heartbeat. We forget what's really important to us...the things that give life meaning, that which makes life fulfilling .... - as they say...so busy making a living that we forget to make a life.

I find that this happens most when we spend our todays 'working for a better tomorrow'....so focused on the better life we expect to have in the years to come that we miss the blessings of today. We look with hope to the days when we will earn a better income, live in a bigger house, not realising that the house we expend all our time and resources to acquire  robs us of the home we could very well be building today.

Now, don't get me wrong....aspiring for a better tomorrow is a necessary occupation - one that keeps us appropriately focused on our goals. The trouble is, not many of us have learnt how to be 'happily discontented'; we haven't taught ourselves how to be grateful in our current situation no matter how dismal it all seems.

Learning to find beauty in the common affairs of life- in our imperfect relationships, our once-white picket fences, our worm-infested flower gardens - is a sure fire way of engaging with life in such a way as to guarantee the future success we crave. We must come to see that our aspirations for the future, and living a life of happiness, contentment and fulfillment, in the present, are not mutually exclusive. We can have them both....finding meaning ans drawing fulfillment in our lives today,  as we confidently work towards the goals that make our tomorrows worth waking up for!

What am I BECOMING?

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Much has been penned about the important questions we must ask ourselves in life. If you have a tendency toward introversion and introspection, like I do, I am sure you would have asked yourself millions of 'important' questions by now....questions, the answers to which sometimes leave you feeling inadequate, under-accomplished or lacking in some other way...questions such as 'what is my life's purpose?' or 'what has been my contribution to the planet?' Deep searching questions that cause us to feel far from equal to the tasks we set ourselves.

Undoubtedly, these musings arise from our own ambitions and ideals, and if we aren't careful, can possibly lead to discouragement. However, I have come to realize that in the same way that audacious goals are realized one conscious decision at a time, deep and piercing questions can be answered one small lesson at a time, one minuscule, intentional action at a time.

But at the end of the day, the important measures of assessment aren't the answers to the deep philosophical questions of purpose or those of apparently less import - those questions of "What am I earning, what am I achieving, what have I accomplished, or what did I get?" The most important question, I have found, is one that is answered with each daily decision. It is simply 'what am I becoming?' How are my current associates and relationships influencing who I am becoming? What is my career making of me?  How are my current pursuits changing me? When I lay in bed at night and reflect on the day that slipped by, do I like the person I see reflected in my thoughts?  Am I  at peace with who I become day by day?

Many things influence and impact our lives everyday. Some we are able to control, others we aren't. Fortunately, our 'becoming' is one of those things over which we have total control. The words of  holocaust survivor, Viktor Frankl, ring true: "Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way." That, my friends, is the essence of BECOMING - the opportunity and right to choose to be better than we were before, in spite of our circumstances....still, for me, the noblest of our human obligations!

Something bigger than Ourselves

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"A man's worth is no greater than his ambitions." Uttered hundreds of years ago by the Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius, I find these words telling. It is our ambitions that stretch us..... or the lack thereof that confines us - more often than we want to admit to ourselves, if we are honest.. Even a cursory, superficial consideration of these words helps us understand how much  control we ultimately have over who we become. But much as these words stir a chord within me,  I have found that there is a much nobler place to which I aspire to belong. The words of Jim Rohn hold greater sway - "We all need to belong to something bigger than ourselves." Yes, indeed we all need to have ambitions that get us beyond ourselves into making contributions that make a difference in the world around us.

It was Zig Ziglar who said "We can have everything we want in life if you just help enough other people get what they want." Significance is a state of being that all of us as human beings crave. We all want to feel a sense of worth; we want not just to create value, but lasting value. We dream of leaving a legacy for those behind us to appreciate and follow. There are very few among us who are content to come into this world and leave without leaving our foot-prints some place upon this earth. That explains why some folk seek notoriety. It satisfies the desire to not die in obscurity, it delivers from oblivion. Created (yes....I take that for granted) as relational beings, even the introverts among us experience the yearning to get beyond themselves sometimes. The question is, what are you doing about that calling that weighs so heavily upon your heart and mind?

If you are like me, you probably feel inadequate to the task. You're probably even now resigning yourself to thoughts that some-one else is more worthy of the yoke. You've just about rendered your need for significance still-born. May I remind you that "we all need to belong to something bigger than ourselves," something that gets us beyond fear and complacency; beyond selfishness and ego-centric tendencies; We all need to understand the value of helping some-one else realize his/her dreams, to bring health and hope and joy to those who need them more than we do. Now I'm not for one moment advocating that we put our personal ambitions and pursuits aside while we find a cause worthy of our association. On the contrary, I suggest....even declare, that all of us have the ability and the means to make space somewhere in the busy sphere of our existence, somewhere within our own dreams and aspirations, to include a cause that will benefit others, and yes.....live long after us.

So what will you do to start preparing for that cause that's bigger than your personal ambitions? In expending your talents, what will you do to ensure that the primary impact lasts way beyond your own existence? What is it that makes you fierce, angry or passionate? What cause is dear to your heart? Is it animal rights, women's rights, the need for tolerance and diversity in our ever-changing world? Are you a lover of children? Can you be the voice of the voiceless, the champion of the under-served? What little can you do to change the lives of those around you, one baby step at a time? It's time to fully embrace the realization that you need to belong to something that takes you outside of personal ambition. It's time to move beyond the good to the realms of the great! Take that first step.

Time and Chance Happen to All Men

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"Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that's the stuff life is made of." I have often pondered these sage words of the great statesman, author, scientist and all round man of action Benjamin Franklin. As an example of time well spent, Franklin's life stands as the essence of industry and voluntarism. His aversion to time-wasting tells in the eventual outcomes of his life. Time is one of those resources that all of us GET in equal daily quantities, MAKE in proportion to the priorities we set ourselves, and SPEND in ways we choose to.

But then there is another element of life that is offered to all men - not in equal quantities, admittedly, but assuredly in sufficient amounts for all of us to use to our advantage. Call it chance (as does the Bible - "time and chance happens to all...Ecc. 9:11) or call it opportunity, the fact is that to every single one of us is offered the gift of opportunities...opportunities to learn new skills, to improve our talents, to network, to make partnerships, to earn (additional) income, to adopt new philosophies, to change our attitudes...you name it...each new day comes to us attended by opportunities that, if we are attentive, we are bound to see. The truth is, not all opportunities are jaw-dropping; not all are our dreams come true. Most are almost imperceptible, unattractive and down-right unpleasant. As they say, opportunities mostly come in overalls....looking like work.

I'm not sure I know how to say this any differently than I am going to do just now: The fact is that who and what we become in life is altogether a result of what we do with these two most important factors in our lives - time and opportunity. Truthfully, we get equal amounts of time and unequal amounts of opportunity. But I have found that our results are not often tied to the extent of our lives (time) or the number of 'good things' that happen to us. Instead, it's as we learn to give time the respect, regard even reverence it deserves that we begin to realize change. It's as we learn to grasp and build on (not necessarily chase) the opportunities life casts at us, that we begin to rise with the tides, that we improve and grow and overcome and become all it is possible for us to be. Time and chance happen to all men....we've got to learn how to use and leverage them for our benefit.

So how are you using your time in relation to your goals and dreams? Jim Rohn, the guru of business philosophy is known to have often said, "We need to make reasonable progress in measurable time." In other words, time is best measured by the progress we make towards some predefined goals. Time ought not to be spent, or passed unawares...its too precious a commodity. Similarly, opportunities ought not to be allowed to pass us by without our being exercised thereby. We don't chase opportunities. We prepare ourselves to leverage and harness those that tend towards our good. And then we capitalize on them...using them for our continued improvement and the ultimate benefit of mankind. Time and chance happen to all men....they happen to you too...question is, are you allowing them to happen FOR you, or are they just passing you by? Ultimately, what you make of them is entirely up to you.

Learning and Becoming

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"We earn at the level of our learning." So it's been said. Who am I to argue? I'm still learning. And I am learning that LEARNING is the major currency in life.  I'm not talking, necessarily, about formal education here. That gives us a living, for sure....but self education is what makes us a fortune. So said the late great business philosopher, Jim Rohn.

Ever wondered why so many people want to earn big, to become famous, to get rich early on in the process? Unfortunately, sometimes they do, and the journey to the bottom usually comes as quickly as did the journey to the top. Too few understand the value of learning. Too few take the lessons of the past and invest them into the future. Too few are deliberate about pursuing a course of study, on their way to mastery.Indeed, too few seek wisdom and knowledge....and far too many get lost in the glamour of the end-game, oblivious of the learning journey that ought to lead there.

The truth is, in  this our achievement-oriented existence, most of us spend our time focusing on the goals we set ourselves. But it is often said that 'what we get by achieving our goals is far less important than what we become by achieving our goals" Indeed, the value is in the becoming...the learning, the change we experience in response to our changing circumstances. When we begin to savor that learning process is when we strike gold. 

Let me here underscore the importance of setting goals - short term goals as well as long term goals. These are what give us something to go after, something to work towards...and they are crucial. While we pursue that (seemingly elusive) balance in our lives, we must learn to set ourselves some  financial goals, and some career goals, some relationship goals, some health goals, some reading goals and yes...some spirituality goals. Go ahead. But keep in mind that the lessons that you will learn from the bumps along the way, the monumental fails, the missed shots are really where the money is. Keep your eye on the prize.....who you are becoming!

So learn to value learning and becoming. Intellectual learning is good and necessary for your success but the wisdom that comes from a life of learning from your experiences and those of others cannot be over-emphasized. And let's not be fooled into believing the straight line theory, or worse yet, don't believe that the learning will take the shape of a curve. It's gonna be squiggly and erratic, spasmodic and inconsistent. But go after the learnings anyway. Only, understand that who you are becoming will forever be more important than what you are achieving. Now, who are you becoming? 

What problem are You solving?

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One of the best ways to be effective in accomplishing our greatest desires in life is to ask ourselves the very potent question, "What problem am I solving?" It's a question that all new entrepreneurs are advised to answer before taking the plunge into launching a venture. But it is a also question that we need to ask ourselves as we approach each new project, large or small. It's a question we should ask of ourselves everyday if we hope to remain relevant and innovative. It is a critical question. It very frequently spells the difference between success and failure in a new venture. It's pretty much the same thing as it relates to the broader picture - life itself.

Am I making a mountain out of a mole-hill here? Is this much ado about nothing? Hardly! The fact is...the quality of the rewards life throws at us will depend largely on the the kinds of problems we solve for others.  And note well - it's the problems we solve for others (not ourselves) that make the difference. It is only as we extend ourselves beyond our own immediate problems, needs, insufficiencies and seek to provide solutions for the bigger issues that surround us that we begin to impact our world and find our own place in the stars.

So how about us changing our focus from "what problems am I facing?" to "what problems am I solving?" and "for whom am I solving them?" Greatness, by God's design and definition, is achieved only in relation to our willingness to serve others. Master motivator, Zig Ziglar is known to have said "You can have everything in life you want if you just help enough other people get what they want." Seems a paradox, but it's true. It is as we give time to finding solutions that other people value that we experience our greatest levels of effectiveness. Tried and proven! Entrepreneurs know that if a product or service doesn't solve a problem, fill a gap or soothe a pain then its chances of doing well in the market is next to none. In the same way, if our lives amount to little more than a self-serving, unintentional, unfocused existence we can expect to remain and/or become unfulfilled promises to mankind.

 So my challenge to all of us today is this.....find a problem to solve; one significant enough to interest enough people in order to sustain it's impact.....And I'm not asking that we  look outside of our strengths, talents and gifts. I'm asking that we  find and harness those talents. If you're a good cook, find a cause that needs your abilities. If you're an artist, know that there are people looking for your creativity. Understand the value of voluntarism to  your growth. You'll likely need to do that, at least initially, to establish a presence in the market place. Go out and solve some problems for the world around you. You'll be surprised at how many of yours get solved in the process.

You'll never change what you tolerate

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You'll never change what you tolerate. There's no getting around this simple truth. The things we tolerate become the standards by which we live, and set the tone for the way others interact with us. The reality is, if we tolerate being abused, we are going to be abused; if we tolerate team members being consistently late, they'll continue being late. If we tolerate being broke, believe me, we will spend the rest of our lives being financially dependent.

It means, therefore, that we've got to learn to lift the bar a little higher. There will be some things we can go easy on, but there's got to come a time when we draw the line; there has to be a place in our lives beyond which we tell ourselves, and those around us, we will not go. There are just some things about which we must take a zero tolerance approach if we are serious about creating a better life for ourselves and those we love.

We'll find that if we set boundaries around our time, our families, our associations, people will respect those boundaries. If we set standards for the way others communicate with us, respect, regard and honour will typify others' interactions with us. The fact is, by clearly defining the things we refuse to tolerate in our personal lives, we marshal the levers of control....we take our lives back...we increase our abilities to create change - exponentially!

The control freak I am (not such a good thing, I've learnt)...when I learnt of the magnitude of the leverage this gave me, I decided on some things I would no longer tolerate. Here are ten:

1. I will not tolerate being broke
2. I will not tolerate living outside of God's will for my life
3. I will not tolerate being overweight
4. I will not tolerate being disrespected (even as I try to respect everyone)
5. I will not tolerate a career that is unfulfilling
6. I will not tolerate living without making a difference in the lives of others
7. I will not tolerate the association of those who have no interest in personal growth
8. I will not tolerate the leadership of those who are stagnant
9. I will not tolerate a life not lived in pursuit of my dreams/my full potential
10. I will not tolerate living without generosity

Obviously, this list is personal.  There are some about which I am far more passionate than others, and those may get more attention.... and that's fine. It's my race, my pace. The bigger issue, now, is you. Where do you need to draw the line? Is this the place where you need to tell some folk to get off? What joy-stealing habits do you need to let go of? What must you NOW institute zero tolerance on? No matter how we spin it, change...significant change... can only happen when we make up our minds to take a zero tolerance approach in the areas of our lives where it matters most. Remember, you can never change what you tolerate!