Monday 17 April 2017

It's Just Harder for Introverts

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The push for personal achievement and success is difficult enough without having to add to it, the fact that you're an introvert. As a leader, I have often found myself in the position of having to fill roles I eschew, and take on tasks I have no desire to perform. From as far back as I can remember, I have always shunned the lime-light. (Don't ask me how one balances that with an intense, irrepressible desire to "be somebody." It may, somehow, explain the unending conflicts at play in my mind and heart). But inevitably I am, with increasing frequency, required to make that public appearance, fumble through interviews and expose myself to what sometimes feels like a skin-removal exercise. It's that bad! Vulnerability becomes an understatement.

The fact is, personal development requires deliberate moves toward self-improvement. It means planning your growth, but more importantly, it means taking action towards achieving those growth goals. Along the path, a few things become obvious:  Firstly, it cannot be done on your own. Growth is always in relation to someone else, some group or some community, whatever that looks like. And secondly, the only real limits we face are the ones we place on ourselves. Neither of the two is particularly good news for introverts.

If you are an introvert you likely prefer spending time to yourself, small talk is your least favourite past time and networking events are like a cage from which you want to cut loose. Brainstorming with the team is not necessarily your most favoured way of coming up with ideas because your best thinking occurs all by your lonesome. You find social situations super-awkward and while you enjoy learning, you certainly don't enjoy having your thoughts imposed upon. You prefer when people around you are self-starters, not needing coaching or personal interventions. The trouble is, growth - yours and that of those you may lead -  requires all that and more.

For extroverts and 'ambiverts' it may ('MAY being the operative word here) be as simple as doing something one has never done before. The task may be intimidating but it may simply be a new invigorating experience. Networking events are an opportunity to meet new people, make new contacts, open new doors. Leaving ones comfort zone often represents new, exciting (yes, maybe initially, uncomfortable) frontiers. But for the introvert it's often an excruciating experience. It cuts across the grain. It's not natural. It's just not who we are . I know. I speak from experience. And though, admittedly, the tasks get easier, it never becomes a place of comfort. But, whether fortunately or unfortunately, these are experiences we have to make up our minds to endure. Our growth requires it......and introverts, no less than extroverts, have the same aching desires to achieve.

  So, if lately you've been feeling that it's too much, if you're feeling absolutely raw and exposed (as I feel even now) do your best to look beyond the moment. Run often to your place of introvert power (whatever that is), eat, drink, refresh yourself and emerge boldly to meet the challenges, remembering that at the end of it all the rewards will be well worth the effort.

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